Thought to Ponder

“The Christian ideal has not been tried and found wanting. It has been found difficult; and left untried.” –Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936)

Isn’t it sad that this statement is just as true today as it was then? We are doing a study on what it means to be a Christian in my Sunday School class, and while I might complain a bit now and then that I feel like I’m being fed information below the level that I’m at, there are still some pearls of wisdom to be gained even if something is taken to a simplified level.

We forget that just because we’re Christians it doesn’t mean that life gets any easier. In fact, it probably gets harder because Satan is now focused on messing up out testimony and trying his hardest to make us feel so completely inadequate that we become paralyzed when it comes to doing God’s work.

We live in a society of convenience and want our relationship with Christ to be as easy to form as it is to microwave a meal. We’ve got to remember that it takes time to learn what God wants us to do. It requires time, patience and willingness to read and listen to what he’s saying. We can’t instantly understand what we’re told, in fact, sometimes we never “get it” and simply have to go on our faith that God is seeing the “big picture” for us. But it doesn’t stop there; John G. Miller said that “learning is not attending, listening or reading. Nor is it merely gaining knowledge. Learning is really about translating knowing what to do into doing what we know. It’s about changing.” How can we accomplish that change if we insist on having a fast-food relationship?

Thought to Ponder

I found out the other day that another of my friends/study partners/people I come in contact with rather frequently is homosexual. She asked me if I hated her because I had recently told her of my faith and that I was Southern Baptist. I told her that I didn’t hate her.

I couldn’t help being reminded later that we are called to “hate the sin and love the sinner.” I couldn’t think of a truer command. What is the point of having a belief based on love, when you can’t see the person behind the sin? And yet, I still hesitate in loving sometimes. It’s very hard to be slapped in the face by reality sometimes and find out that what you think isn’t necessarily what is real. My nature says, “hate and distrust” things and people who are not like me, but the Jesus in me says, love anyway like your father loves you. I never realized how difficult that could be until high school and now another layer has been added to what happened then. I know what I’m supposed to do, it’s just complicated sometimes.

Lord, help me to be your missionary of love by breaking my heart and showing me how to pour my love into the lives of others

Thought to Ponder

Will you be a people pleaser or a Father pleaser?” (Hagee, 27)

What is it about us that craves the attention of others instead of the attention of a loving God? He can be so much more attentive than we can ever dream of and yet we still try to find solace with others. We become content with “our lot” and don’t even realize that it’s not “our lot” at all. He wants us to be and do so much more than we are capable of and I think that scares most of us to petrification. We don’t die to what he wants to do in us, but we can become so rigid in our “normal” routines of going to church, volunteering with children and youth events, singing in the choir, etc. that we deny the fact that he wants more of us. We lie to ourselves saying, “I’m doing enough or I’m doing too much and no one else is helping.” It’s not about how much we feel is enough but about how much God wants us to do. Now don’t take that to mean that you should be doing everything at once either. We are not a one man band; we are a body and each part needs to work together in order to glorify God.

It isn’t quite

It isn’t quite your holiness,
And it isn’t quite your love
That consumes me when I first get up
On a well-rested morning.

It’s a little bit of both, I guess.
Like the dew of your tenderness,
It covers me so thoroughly,
And makes me want to run, laughing,
And also to sit still.

I don’t know how to explain
What I don’t quite yet understand—
The dreams I have that peel me open
Like a not quite blooming flower
Revealing every earthed and unearthed desire.

So painful to be ripped so gently open
And so grateful when it’s over
So broken, and so at peace;
So unsure of what I’ve just gone through
And so much wishing that it could have gone on forever.

News

I don’t know many things that I’m certain of, but of this one I’m sure: that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus. It has been an embarrassingly difficult past couple of months. Probably since the moment I decided I wanted to go to seminary, I have run into so many complications, necessary errands, emergencies, meetings, and general hoopla standing in the way of getting that application done that at times, I didn’t know whether to submit to God, or resist the devil. Am I supposed to go to seminary or not? Recently, though, I found out that my path has exactly two potential courses:

In the first one, I give up on going to seminary, or put it off for an indefinite amount of time, say until I feel like it. The second option is that I pray to the God of grace and mercy and He makes a way for me to get this application done before they decide it’s too late for me to get in this semester. The crisis comes because I’m poor, and my family doubly so: I discovered recently that they changed the grace period between when you get out of school and when you start paying your loans from 9 months to 6 months. This means that I start getting a bill for 250-some-odd dollars each month starting in November, instead of January, like I was expecting. The job I have now, and am likely to have in November doesn’t pay enough for me to make that kind of payment and buy food at the same time. There are exactly two alternatives to making that gigantic ferocious payment: The first one is that I get back in school, and pronto. The second is that I apply for some little thing called forbearance.

In plain English, forbearance means “to put up with.” In law, it means “the act of a creditor who refrains from enforcing a debt when it falls due.” In theology, it describes exactly the state of a person who is unrepentant of his sins and hasn’t gone to hell yet. As I see it, this means that I have either the option of going to seminary or requesting that the US government publicly proclaim me as an unconverted sinner. Gotta love those black-and-white scenarios.

Please pray for me. Today I will be finishing up my (quite tardy) seminary application. The fear of brimstone prods me on.

Nevertheless, I really feel that I’ve grown in the past few months. I think I’ve regained a lot of ground. I’m starting to act a whole heck of a lot more like myself. I’m remembering the callings that He put upon my heart a very long time ago, and I’m remembering that the God of all things will never let me go. He is stuborner than I am, so I am sure to fulfill everything that he has planned for me. So I will say it has been a very good (if gauntlet-like) time for me.


In other news, my sister is getting married in slightly less than two weeks. My friend is duly jealous. My parents are duly anxious. Ces and Jason aren’t telling what’s going on in their thick little noggins. Me? I’m broke. I had to buy two plane tickets and a wedding present.